Freedom

The freedom she was seeking
Outside of herself from the world
Was to stop running from herself.
The irony of it amused her.
The moment she understood this
She broke down all the barriers
That kept her from herself
And finally found her way home
Never to lose it again.

Reflecting on what it took
Made her smile.
Abandonment, rejection, betrayal
Dashed hopes, failed ambitions
Invalidation, disrespect
Physical injuries, codependency
Financial insecurity, injustice
Lies, cheating, manipulation
Broken dreams, shattered soul
False masks, the works!

It took everything
All of her. Over a period of time.
She doesn't regret it one bit.
The rewards are worth it.

It's like hitting rock bottom
Is what it took
For her to want herself
To choose herself.

Now rock bottom became
Her favorite hangout spot.
It helped her become aware
Of where she needed to heal
For the world was only mirroring
Back to her who she was on the inside.
Deeply hurt attracting more hurt.
She poked at her own wounds
To analyse and understand
Where and why it hurt.
She learnt to heal herself.
She reclaimed all the parts
Of herself she'd given away
And became whole again.

She understood that
She could only hold on to the limited.
She can only become one with the infinite possibility
She could not contain it.
She began to understand grace and flow.
She aspired to be one
With the Universe
For trying to control it was futile
Playing along joy.

a*k²